I remember exactly what I was doing the day I decided to marry Charly.
Charly and I had been talking again through Facebook, texting, and even Skype. She had sent me a book that told the story of the things she had been doing since our breakup.
I was at my sister Melissa's house and I was reading the book she sent me. Something about the book captivated me. I couldn't put it down. I read it from start to finish with almost no interruptions. The book made me realize how much I missed Charly and even how much she had grown. I felt the Spirit very strongly and I knew that I wanted to marry her.
That night I prayed about it.
"Dear Father in Heaven," I started, "I want to marry Charly. What do ya say?"
After asking the question I was filled with a sense of peace and I knew that Charly was a great choice for me and that God approved. I could almost imagine Him saying, "Go for it Ben!"
It was a special moment for me and I will never forget it. I know without a shadow of a doubt that Charly and I will have a happy marriage and that I made the right choice when I decided to marry her. It won't always be easy but it will always be worth it and I know that as long as we choose, God, Jesus Christ, and the Holy Ghost will help us in our lives and marriage.
Ben and I got married on April 20, 2013 in the Bountiful Temple. We wanted to use this blog to share the experience of being married from the perspectives of both husband and wife. We love being married and we hope you enjoy this blog as much as we do! Don't forget to follow us and feel free to leave a comment on our posts--we love to hear from you!
Showing posts with label Love Story. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Love Story. Show all posts
Sunday, February 9, 2014
The Moment I Decided to Marry my Husband
This one is tricky for me. Have you ever tried to pinpoint a moment that gradually grew into being?
I remember a couple months after we went on our first date, we were at my cousin's house together. I was sitting on the couch and he was rolling around on the floor with my seven-year-old cousin, playing some sort of game with her. As I sat watching, I knew that Benjamin was the sort of guy I could marry, the sort of man I wanted as the father of my children.
It wasn't until later that I decided Benjamin was the one for me. I think it happened before we were officially dating; I knew that Ben had all the qualities that I was looking for in a spouse.
I remember after we were dating, I was so sure Benjamin and I would end up together. We were in love and I knew that, so I didn't foresee anything coming between us. I would pray to Heavenly Father at night and say, "Heavenly Father, Benjamin is the one I want. I want to marry him." I felt so good afterwards, every time, I was sure that meant that I just had to be patient because eventually, my wish would come true.
Then we broke up.
That put a damper in all my plans. It was hard for me because it had been a done deal in my mind. I felt that I was giving up on Benjamin and that it wasn't right to fall in love with someone else when I had been so in love with Ben before.
Luckily for me, Benjamin later decided that I was the one he wanted to marry.
Luckily for him, I hadn't changed my mind.
I remember a couple months after we went on our first date, we were at my cousin's house together. I was sitting on the couch and he was rolling around on the floor with my seven-year-old cousin, playing some sort of game with her. As I sat watching, I knew that Benjamin was the sort of guy I could marry, the sort of man I wanted as the father of my children.
It wasn't until later that I decided Benjamin was the one for me. I think it happened before we were officially dating; I knew that Ben had all the qualities that I was looking for in a spouse.
I remember after we were dating, I was so sure Benjamin and I would end up together. We were in love and I knew that, so I didn't foresee anything coming between us. I would pray to Heavenly Father at night and say, "Heavenly Father, Benjamin is the one I want. I want to marry him." I felt so good afterwards, every time, I was sure that meant that I just had to be patient because eventually, my wish would come true.
Then we broke up.
That put a damper in all my plans. It was hard for me because it had been a done deal in my mind. I felt that I was giving up on Benjamin and that it wasn't right to fall in love with someone else when I had been so in love with Ben before.
Luckily for me, Benjamin later decided that I was the one he wanted to marry.
Luckily for him, I hadn't changed my mind.
Sunday, January 26, 2014
My New Black Friends!
I was just getting off the frontrunner from work on Saturday when a tall black man and a shorter black woman approached me.
"Can I borrow your cell phone to make a phone call?" The tall man asked me. Dang, I thought, I hate it when people ask me that and I don't have my phone.
"I would let you borrow it but I left it at my friends house," I replied. "My wife is coming to pick me up here soon though and you can use hers."
"That works," The tall one said again. The three of us started walking over the the frontrunner parking lot.
"What brings you two out here to West Jordan?" I asked.
"My mom's boyfriend is getting baptized today," The tall one responded again.
"That's awesome!" I exclaimed, "I love baptisms. They are always so cool."
"Yeah," He said. "I'm a convert to the church. I was baptized when I was 16 and I was the first one in my family to join the church."
"Wow!" I said. "That must have been hard. You were the pioneer of your family."
"Yup," He said.
About then Charly, her mom, and Luke pulled up in her mom's little white Honda Civic. Charly got out and I asked her if my new friends could use her phone. Of course she said yes and handed the phone to man.
"What are your names?" I asked.
The girl spoke, "My name is Mia," She said, "And this is Wallace." Wallace grinned at me. He was on the phone with his mom.
"My name is Benjamin and this is Charly," I said, introducing us.
After calling, Wallace and Mia found that they would have to wait a while in the parking lot for Wallace's mom to pick them up. We ended up offering them a ride.
"I don't know how well the four of us are going to fit in the back of this little Honda..." I said. "How tall are you Wallace?"
"I'm 6' 6''," He said grinning again.
We all squeezed in. Charly sat on my lap which work out pretty well for me. We were able to get them to the right place and as far as I know they made it to the baptism with their mom.
Both Charly and I love it when we get opportunities to serve other people. I know that we will be blessed for it even if the things we do are small sometimes. I always enjoy making new friends as well and it's not every day that I get to make new black friends! Unfortunately there just aren't as many in Utah as there are in Brazil.
"Can I borrow your cell phone to make a phone call?" The tall man asked me. Dang, I thought, I hate it when people ask me that and I don't have my phone.
"I would let you borrow it but I left it at my friends house," I replied. "My wife is coming to pick me up here soon though and you can use hers."
"That works," The tall one said again. The three of us started walking over the the frontrunner parking lot.
"What brings you two out here to West Jordan?" I asked.
"My mom's boyfriend is getting baptized today," The tall one responded again.
"That's awesome!" I exclaimed, "I love baptisms. They are always so cool."
"Yeah," He said. "I'm a convert to the church. I was baptized when I was 16 and I was the first one in my family to join the church."
"Wow!" I said. "That must have been hard. You were the pioneer of your family."
"Yup," He said.
About then Charly, her mom, and Luke pulled up in her mom's little white Honda Civic. Charly got out and I asked her if my new friends could use her phone. Of course she said yes and handed the phone to man.
"What are your names?" I asked.
The girl spoke, "My name is Mia," She said, "And this is Wallace." Wallace grinned at me. He was on the phone with his mom.
"My name is Benjamin and this is Charly," I said, introducing us.
After calling, Wallace and Mia found that they would have to wait a while in the parking lot for Wallace's mom to pick them up. We ended up offering them a ride.
"I don't know how well the four of us are going to fit in the back of this little Honda..." I said. "How tall are you Wallace?"
"I'm 6' 6''," He said grinning again.
We all squeezed in. Charly sat on my lap which work out pretty well for me. We were able to get them to the right place and as far as I know they made it to the baptism with their mom.
Both Charly and I love it when we get opportunities to serve other people. I know that we will be blessed for it even if the things we do are small sometimes. I always enjoy making new friends as well and it's not every day that I get to make new black friends! Unfortunately there just aren't as many in Utah as there are in Brazil.
Sunday, December 22, 2013
Vegan Chili with Beaf
So a few days ago Charly and I decided to have chili for dinner. I was excited because I like chili. This time was different though. Charly and I had some canned chili and I wanted to add some vegetables to it so I looked up a recipe online and completely ignored the instructions, using the picture as a reference.
"Charly do you want some vegetables in your chili?" I asked as I chopped up the sweet peppers and spinach. She looked over at my preparations and gave me her look.
"No thanks," She said.
"Come on!" I insisted.
"Nope," She answered again.
"Just try some," I said, holding out a chip with some chili on it.
"Ok," She said." Charly ate the chip with my chili on it.
"It's pretty good actually," She said with a smile.
"I know!" I answered excitedly. "I didn't make this one up like the corn soup Charly. I found a real vegan chili recipe online."
The excitement left my voice as I looked down into my bowl.
"Oh no! There is beef in this chili!" I exclaimed. "I made vegan chili with beef in it!"
Charly just laughed.
"Charly do you want some vegetables in your chili?" I asked as I chopped up the sweet peppers and spinach. She looked over at my preparations and gave me her look.
"No thanks," She said.
"Come on!" I insisted.
"Nope," She answered again.
"Just try some," I said, holding out a chip with some chili on it.
"Ok," She said." Charly ate the chip with my chili on it.
"It's pretty good actually," She said with a smile.
"I know!" I answered excitedly. "I didn't make this one up like the corn soup Charly. I found a real vegan chili recipe online."
The excitement left my voice as I looked down into my bowl.
"Oh no! There is beef in this chili!" I exclaimed. "I made vegan chili with beef in it!"
Charly just laughed.
Sunday, December 8, 2013
A Christmas Present to Us
My mom has a Christmas tradition with Christmas presents that I love--every year, instead of writing the person's name on every single one of their presents, she has a specific wrapping paper for each individual person. It's really fun, because in the weeks leading up to Christmas, you can try to figure out which wrapping paper is yours. This is a tradition I wanted to continue in my own family, so I bought two different rolls of wrapping paper at Wal Mart.
"No, no!" I shouted, in my typical panicky voice. Ben says we have a good chance statistically of dying at the same time, since he's older and a guy but never stressed, while I'm younger and a girl but always stressed out.
"What?" Ben asked in sincere innocence, not letting go of the griddle.
"The griddle," I said, walking over and taking it away from him. "I'm going to wrap it."
"Oh," Ben said, giving me a puzzled look. "Who's it going to be for?"
"Us, of course," I laughed.
"Oh," Ben said, giving me a puzzled look. "Who's it going to be for?"
"Us, of course," I laughed.
"Both of us?" Ben asked.
"Yes ..." I said, looking for the trick in the question.
"But ..." Ben grinned his teasing-Charly smile. "What wrapping paper are you going to use?"
I just rolled my eyes, though I couldn't help grinning along with Ben.
Sunday, December 1, 2013
The day my husband locked me out of the bathroom ...
After Ben and I got married, I learned that Ben always locks the door. Always. Normally, this is fine. This week, it proved to be slightly problematic.
Tuesday morning I woke up very groggy. Ben and I had had a very late night Monday and I did not want to get up early to catch the bus. While I was at dance the night before, Ben had fixed our car and it was very tempting to sleep an extra hour and simply drive.
"Ben," I asked, leaning across the bed.
"Hmmm?" Benjamin asked, his eyebrows pinching together. That's his I'm-tired-why-are-you-talking face. He doesn't know he makes it.
"Can I drive today?"
"Why?" Ben didn't even open his eyes.
"So I can sleep in a little." I said, a little impatiently.
"Oh. Yeah, that's fine." Ben rolled over and fell back to sleep quickly. I rolled over too, but didn't find sleep as fast. I needed to go to the bathroom.
With a sigh, I got up and found my way through our maze of clean and dirty clothes strewn around the room (I hate putting away laundry ...) and found the bathroom door shut. Ben likes to keep the doors closed in our apartment so it looks nicer. I turned the knob only ... it didn't turn. I turned it again, no luck. I fumbled back into the bedroom.
Uh-oh, I thought. I went outside to get a broken piece of hanger, attempting to use it as a lock pick. No luck.
I fumbled back into the room and said in a loud, half whisper, "Ben!"
"What?" he asked, his voice slurring sleepily.
As I answered, I knelt down next to the alarm we had set the night before. It was supposed to go off at 6:30. It was 6:23. "The bathroom door is locked."
"Turn it really hard, sometimes it just gets jammed." At this point, Ben was probably mostly asleep still.
"Okay," I said, doubting it would work even as I agreed to it. "I'll try it, but I turned it hard before."
After shutting off the alarm so it wouldn't wake Ben up, I went back to the door. and twisted the knob with all my strength. Once, twice, three times. It still wouldn't budge; I could tell it was locked. I knew I needed to get the door open so I could go to school ... I'm not the kind of girl who spends a ton of time in the bathroom, but there was no way I would go out in public without at least doing my hair first. I decided to take advice from Ever After and got a screwdriver out.
I was trying to get the screws off, but it was tricky with how they were positioned when Ben came out of the bedroom, still half asleep. He must have heard my clumsy attempts with the screwdriver. He took over and had the door handle off and the door unlocked in less than five minutes.
"Thanks Ben," I said, rewarding his efforts with a kiss. "And now that I'm awake, I can take the bus!" Ben just laughed and went back to bed.
Tuesday morning I woke up very groggy. Ben and I had had a very late night Monday and I did not want to get up early to catch the bus. While I was at dance the night before, Ben had fixed our car and it was very tempting to sleep an extra hour and simply drive.
"Ben," I asked, leaning across the bed.
"Hmmm?" Benjamin asked, his eyebrows pinching together. That's his I'm-tired-why-are-you-talking face. He doesn't know he makes it.
"Can I drive today?"
"Why?" Ben didn't even open his eyes.
"So I can sleep in a little." I said, a little impatiently.
"Oh. Yeah, that's fine." Ben rolled over and fell back to sleep quickly. I rolled over too, but didn't find sleep as fast. I needed to go to the bathroom.
With a sigh, I got up and found my way through our maze of clean and dirty clothes strewn around the room (I hate putting away laundry ...) and found the bathroom door shut. Ben likes to keep the doors closed in our apartment so it looks nicer. I turned the knob only ... it didn't turn. I turned it again, no luck. I fumbled back into the bedroom.
Uh-oh, I thought. I went outside to get a broken piece of hanger, attempting to use it as a lock pick. No luck.
I fumbled back into the room and said in a loud, half whisper, "Ben!"
"What?" he asked, his voice slurring sleepily.
As I answered, I knelt down next to the alarm we had set the night before. It was supposed to go off at 6:30. It was 6:23. "The bathroom door is locked."
"Turn it really hard, sometimes it just gets jammed." At this point, Ben was probably mostly asleep still.
"Okay," I said, doubting it would work even as I agreed to it. "I'll try it, but I turned it hard before."
After shutting off the alarm so it wouldn't wake Ben up, I went back to the door. and twisted the knob with all my strength. Once, twice, three times. It still wouldn't budge; I could tell it was locked. I knew I needed to get the door open so I could go to school ... I'm not the kind of girl who spends a ton of time in the bathroom, but there was no way I would go out in public without at least doing my hair first. I decided to take advice from Ever After and got a screwdriver out.
I was trying to get the screws off, but it was tricky with how they were positioned when Ben came out of the bedroom, still half asleep. He must have heard my clumsy attempts with the screwdriver. He took over and had the door handle off and the door unlocked in less than five minutes.
"Thanks Ben," I said, rewarding his efforts with a kiss. "And now that I'm awake, I can take the bus!" Ben just laughed and went back to bed.
Sunday, November 3, 2013
Fast Sunday Breakfast!
Charly and I missed fast Sunday last month. We forgot it was fast Sunday and ate. In order to make sure that didn't happen again we reminded each other constantly over the course of this last week. Charly really wanted to remember and reminded me quite a bit.
When I woke up this morning (Fast Sunday) Charly was already awake. I was a little sleepy still and so I sort of stumbled out of the bedroom and into the kitchen.
To my surprise Charly was standing there beaming, and pointing and the wonderful breakfast she had made for me. It looked amazing and she had made my two favorite things to have for breakfast, German Pancakes and Fruit/Veggie Smoothies! Right when I saw it I remembered that it was fast Sunday...
"Oh boy," I thought.
I walked up to Charly and just hugged her. She of course wasn't sure how to take that because it was an odd time for a hug.
"What are you doing?" She asked.
"I'm giving you comfort." I said. "It's fast Sunday."
"Dang it!" Charly exclaimed.
I just kept hugging her and then we started laughing about it.
"I guess we'll just have to fast next Sunday," She said through the laughing.
Fast Sunday ... Oops.
I woke up this morning at 6:30, due to daylight savings. I thought I'd get up and surprise Ben with a clean kitchen and delicious breakfast.
About an hour later, I came to wake Ben up. "Ben," I said, "Wanna get up now?"
"No," he said. Of course.
"Why not? You've slept plenty long." I wanted him to get up and come see my surprise.
"My alarm hasn't gone off," Ben said. It was 7:19, his alarm was set for 7:30. He seemed perfectly awake to me, so I jumped off the bed and set the alarm for 7:20.
"No fair," he said, as I came back to snuggle with him until the alarm went off. "You changed my alarm."
"How do you know?" I asked in my most innocent tone of voice.
"Because you went over there ..." He said in his I'm-picked-on voice.
"I could have had many reasons to go over there."
"Yeah," he agreed. "To change my alarm."
"That is one reason I could have for going over there," I agreed, still claiming innocence. Just then, his alarm went off. "Oh, that's your alarm. Better get that."
"Will you get that alarm for me?" Ben asked me, grinning.
"No," I laughed, pulling his blanket off. "Come on, come see!"
"Come see what?"
"Just," I said, jumping off the bed and turning off the alarm. "Just come see."
I took him by the hand and led him to the kitchen, where I had his favorite breakfast of fruit smoothies and German pancakes set out and ready to eat.
"Ta da!"
Ben looked at me with a funny look on his face. Then he moved towards me, pulling me into a hug.
"Charly," he said. "Do you remember that it's Fast Sunday?"
I slumped, dropping my arms to my side. Somehow I had totally forgotten Fast Sunday. I don't know how; I'd been reminding Ben all week. Literally. "No ....."
I tried to pull away from Ben, but he kept a tight hold on me.
"I knew you'd need a hug when you found that out," Ben said.
I guess we'll be fasting next week. As long as I don't make breakfast, that is.
About an hour later, I came to wake Ben up. "Ben," I said, "Wanna get up now?"
"No," he said. Of course.
"Why not? You've slept plenty long." I wanted him to get up and come see my surprise.
"My alarm hasn't gone off," Ben said. It was 7:19, his alarm was set for 7:30. He seemed perfectly awake to me, so I jumped off the bed and set the alarm for 7:20.
"No fair," he said, as I came back to snuggle with him until the alarm went off. "You changed my alarm."
"How do you know?" I asked in my most innocent tone of voice.
"Because you went over there ..." He said in his I'm-picked-on voice.
"I could have had many reasons to go over there."
"Yeah," he agreed. "To change my alarm."
"That is one reason I could have for going over there," I agreed, still claiming innocence. Just then, his alarm went off. "Oh, that's your alarm. Better get that."
"Will you get that alarm for me?" Ben asked me, grinning.
"No," I laughed, pulling his blanket off. "Come on, come see!"
"Come see what?"
"Just," I said, jumping off the bed and turning off the alarm. "Just come see."
I took him by the hand and led him to the kitchen, where I had his favorite breakfast of fruit smoothies and German pancakes set out and ready to eat.
"Ta da!"
Ben looked at me with a funny look on his face. Then he moved towards me, pulling me into a hug.
"Charly," he said. "Do you remember that it's Fast Sunday?"
I slumped, dropping my arms to my side. Somehow I had totally forgotten Fast Sunday. I don't know how; I'd been reminding Ben all week. Literally. "No ....."
I tried to pull away from Ben, but he kept a tight hold on me.
"I knew you'd need a hug when you found that out," Ben said.
I guess we'll be fasting next week. As long as I don't make breakfast, that is.
Sunday, October 20, 2013
This is Not a Date.
Friday night is my favorite, because it is date night.And I am very pro-dating.
Now, if you know me, you know that my definition of dating is different than most anyone else. It has to fit all the criteria for a date--planned for as a date, paid for by one person, and paired off. On top of that, though, a date is only a date if it feels like a date.
Lately, because of school and being sick and other obstacles, our date nights haven't exactly met my "date criteria." Don't get me wrong, I love spending time with Ben and, since we pretty much everything together just as a couple, we go on a lot of dates, in Ben's definition of a date. I was excited for our date this week, though, and had it planned out flawlessly.
While I was at school in the morning, I stopped to buy tickets for BYU's Humor U performance that night. That's when everything started going wrong.
Our one and only car wouldn't start for me after class. I just walked the hour and a half home. Then Ben got home late from work. That, on top of our need to figure out the car (as well as a paper that Ben needed to write for school) meant that we missed our already-paid-for-show. We spent the early evening with our Bishop, trying to get the car to start.
We finally got it to start and drove home. On the way, Ben remarked, "Well, this was an interesting date."
"This isn't a date." It had been a hard, stressful day for me and I was very disappointed that our date was, once again, turning into what I considered to not be a date.
Luckily, we had a gift card to Coldstones Creamery. When we got home, I asked Ben if we could go out for ice cream. He, of course, agreed. The Coldstones we ended up going to was in the same parking lot as the Provo dollar theater. Before we went inside, we noticed that Monster University was playing in the dollar theater. Neither of us had seen it yet, but we both wanted to, so we went to the 10:30 showing, getting a discount with our student ID's.
It started off as a really awful date for me. Nothing had been gong the way I had planned and I was frustrated. Things turned out perfectly, though, and it was a really great date night. I love my husband. He's not a huge planner and he and I might not agree on the definition of a date. When it's really important, though, Benjamin is so sweet.
When I got married, I thought it was important to have a husband who would take me dancing and sing me songs on the guitar and plan romantic, fun dates. Those things are nice. I still enjoy listening to Ben play guitar, I love dancing whit him, and I wouldn't mind if he planned more dates. That's not what actually matters, though.
It matters when I'm upset and he just holds me.
It's important to me that he takes the lead in finding a way to fix, say, the car.
I'm so grateful for his patience with me when I'm grumpy that something didn't work out.
It is perfect that he doesn't get frustrated or stressed like I do.
It's the little moments in everyday life that are important. And let me tell you, singing romantic songs on the guitar isn't what it's all about.
Now, if you know me, you know that my definition of dating is different than most anyone else. It has to fit all the criteria for a date--planned for as a date, paid for by one person, and paired off. On top of that, though, a date is only a date if it feels like a date.
Lately, because of school and being sick and other obstacles, our date nights haven't exactly met my "date criteria." Don't get me wrong, I love spending time with Ben and, since we pretty much everything together just as a couple, we go on a lot of dates, in Ben's definition of a date. I was excited for our date this week, though, and had it planned out flawlessly.
While I was at school in the morning, I stopped to buy tickets for BYU's Humor U performance that night. That's when everything started going wrong.
Our one and only car wouldn't start for me after class. I just walked the hour and a half home. Then Ben got home late from work. That, on top of our need to figure out the car (as well as a paper that Ben needed to write for school) meant that we missed our already-paid-for-show. We spent the early evening with our Bishop, trying to get the car to start.
We finally got it to start and drove home. On the way, Ben remarked, "Well, this was an interesting date."
"This isn't a date." It had been a hard, stressful day for me and I was very disappointed that our date was, once again, turning into what I considered to not be a date.
Luckily, we had a gift card to Coldstones Creamery. When we got home, I asked Ben if we could go out for ice cream. He, of course, agreed. The Coldstones we ended up going to was in the same parking lot as the Provo dollar theater. Before we went inside, we noticed that Monster University was playing in the dollar theater. Neither of us had seen it yet, but we both wanted to, so we went to the 10:30 showing, getting a discount with our student ID's.
It started off as a really awful date for me. Nothing had been gong the way I had planned and I was frustrated. Things turned out perfectly, though, and it was a really great date night. I love my husband. He's not a huge planner and he and I might not agree on the definition of a date. When it's really important, though, Benjamin is so sweet.
When I got married, I thought it was important to have a husband who would take me dancing and sing me songs on the guitar and plan romantic, fun dates. Those things are nice. I still enjoy listening to Ben play guitar, I love dancing whit him, and I wouldn't mind if he planned more dates. That's not what actually matters, though.
It matters when I'm upset and he just holds me.
It's important to me that he takes the lead in finding a way to fix, say, the car.
I'm so grateful for his patience with me when I'm grumpy that something didn't work out.
It is perfect that he doesn't get frustrated or stressed like I do.
It's the little moments in everyday life that are important. And let me tell you, singing romantic songs on the guitar isn't what it's all about.
Sunday, October 13, 2013
My Favorite Picture of Charly
I'm such a lucky guy.
Sunday, October 6, 2013
When I Couldn't Get Ben to Hold my Hand ...
Ben and I went on our first date January 2011.
We didn't start exclusively dating until January 2012.
In that year, we didn't kiss. We didn't hold hands.
The most I got out of Ben was an arm around my shoulder while we took a picture.
It was a really long year for me.
In October of 2011, about eight months after our first date, I started to get a little impatient with how slowly Benjamin was moving. I liked him a lot. And I mean, A LOT. And I knew he liked me. That was about the time we both started being more obvious about our feelings for each other. But I couldn't understand, if Ben liked me as much as I knew he did, why he didn't make any moves.
I really wanted Ben to hold my hand. I knew he was careful with his kisses and I didn't expect him to kiss me for a long time. But holding my hand, I thought that was a reasonable expectation.
Now, normally I didn't have any qualms about holding a guy's hand first. With Ben, though, I was so nervous. I couldn't make myself do it, for whatever reason.
So, I started hinting. At first, I was subtle. When that didn't work, my hints slowly grew more obvious. Every single time we went out, we would sit close to each other. So close that our legs would be touching. Our hands would be sitting right next to each other.
But Ben never held my hand. I couldn't understand it.
Then we started dating exclusively. It was wonderful and exciting and I couldn't have been happier. But he still didn't hold my hand. My family teased me mercilessly when they found that out.
When I saw him next, we were watching a movie. We were sitting in our normal position, sitting close enough to be touching, both our hands free and sitting next to each other. I sat there, once again wanting to reach for his hand but feeling nervous. Then I thought, "This is ridiculous, we're dating. I can hold hands with my boyfriend." So I did. And later that night, he kissed me.
It was a great weekend for me. Later, when talking about this situation, Ben told me that he hadn't held my hand because it just hadn't occurred to him. He had wanted to kiss me several times before that, but holding hands wasn't as big of a deal to him as it was to me. Now we look back and laugh at it.
We didn't start exclusively dating until January 2012.
In that year, we didn't kiss. We didn't hold hands.
The most I got out of Ben was an arm around my shoulder while we took a picture.
It was a really long year for me.
This is the picture with his arm around me.
In October of 2011, about eight months after our first date, I started to get a little impatient with how slowly Benjamin was moving. I liked him a lot. And I mean, A LOT. And I knew he liked me. That was about the time we both started being more obvious about our feelings for each other. But I couldn't understand, if Ben liked me as much as I knew he did, why he didn't make any moves.
I really wanted Ben to hold my hand. I knew he was careful with his kisses and I didn't expect him to kiss me for a long time. But holding my hand, I thought that was a reasonable expectation.
Now, normally I didn't have any qualms about holding a guy's hand first. With Ben, though, I was so nervous. I couldn't make myself do it, for whatever reason.
So, I started hinting. At first, I was subtle. When that didn't work, my hints slowly grew more obvious. Every single time we went out, we would sit close to each other. So close that our legs would be touching. Our hands would be sitting right next to each other.
But Ben never held my hand. I couldn't understand it.
Then we started dating exclusively. It was wonderful and exciting and I couldn't have been happier. But he still didn't hold my hand. My family teased me mercilessly when they found that out.
When I saw him next, we were watching a movie. We were sitting in our normal position, sitting close enough to be touching, both our hands free and sitting next to each other. I sat there, once again wanting to reach for his hand but feeling nervous. Then I thought, "This is ridiculous, we're dating. I can hold hands with my boyfriend." So I did. And later that night, he kissed me.
It was a great weekend for me. Later, when talking about this situation, Ben told me that he hadn't held my hand because it just hadn't occurred to him. He had wanted to kiss me several times before that, but holding hands wasn't as big of a deal to him as it was to me. Now we look back and laugh at it.
Sunday, September 15, 2013
Benjamin in Only 1 Word
Patient.
If you know Benjamin at all, you will understand why I chose this word. For Ben, being patient is more than something he simply does; patience is something he is. When he drives, when he talks, when he helps me with my math homework--Ben is patient. This is one of the biggest differences in our personalities and I am constantly striving to be more like him in this area. It's one of the first things I noticed about him and continues to be one of my favorite things about my husband.
If you know Benjamin at all, you will understand why I chose this word. For Ben, being patient is more than something he simply does; patience is something he is. When he drives, when he talks, when he helps me with my math homework--Ben is patient. This is one of the biggest differences in our personalities and I am constantly striving to be more like him in this area. It's one of the first things I noticed about him and continues to be one of my favorite things about my husband.
Sunday, September 8, 2013
The Things Charly Does to Keep Our Relationship Strong
I think the title explains this post pretty well. These aren't in any specific order. I just wrote each one as I thought of it.
1. Charly loves me.
I know because she tells me and because she serves me and puts up with me.
2. She works hard.
She is always doing something whether it's school, cleaning the house, or working her part time job. She is a hard worker and she is always busy.
3. She spends as much time with me as she can.
Sometimes it's hard with school and work and all of the things we are doing but she always makes time for me. Even if all we do is watch a doctor who episode during lunch, we make sure to spend time together every day.
4. She listens to me.
Let's be honest... I talk a lot. Sometimes I talk about things that I know that Charly really isn't interested in, like math or programming, but she still listens.
5. She shares her feelings with me.
I'm very grateful that she tells me how she is feeling. I know I'm not the best yet when it comes to validating and empathizing but it makes me feel like I'm part of Charly's life when she shares her frustrations, joys, and other feelings with me.
6. She feeds me.
Yup. I'm a guy. I need food. I try to help with preparing the food, even if I just get out the dishes or clean them after but lets be honest, she is a much better cook.
7. She lets me hold her hand almost all of the time.
8. Sometimes she kisses me first.
Let me tell you. I'm pretty lucky. Sometimes I get kisses when I'm not expecting them and I love that about Charly.
9. She helps me make sure that we read our scriptures and say our prayers together every night.
10. She goes on dates with me every week.
I think this one is one of the most important ones. It's up there with spending time together. We always have fun on our dates even when they only consist of buying a couple books at Barnes and Noble.
I remember every day how lucky I am to have Charly as my wife. I'm so glad that I chose to ask her to marry me and that she chose to say yes.
How to Make a Marriage Work
My Grandma Pat died when I was very young. At her funeral, they read a few excerpts from her journal. My Grandma Sue, the woman my Grandpa ended up remarrying, was at the funeral and heard as they read the words, "Arno knew how to make a marriage work," straight from my grandmother's everyday journal.
That is my Grandpa Sue's favorite lessons for the grandchildren--that my grandfather knows how to make a marriage work and why.
Benjamin, too, knows how to make a marriage work. This is a list of some of those ways.
1. Ben is patient with me. Even when I am grumpy or talkative or irritated or excited.
2. Ben does all the little things still--things like opening the door or putting his arm around me in church.
3. Ben does the dishes while I'm at work and offers to help with dinner.
4. Ben will do things for me even when it isn't necessarily the thing he wants to be doing. He goes grocery shopping and helps me with math homework late at night and drives me to dance.
5. Ben never treats me poorly. He never says anything to me or about me that would indicate a poor opinion of me. Ben lets me know that he thinks I am wonderful and that I can be wonderful.
6. Ben snuggles with me in the mornings when we wake up. I don't know if every healthy marriage needs this, but it sure helps ours.
7. Ben is thoughtful enough to think of my needs. He will carry heavy things, unload the car, and give up his jacket in the cold for me. I never even have to ask.
8. Ben makes me laugh. It is my personal opinion that not every person in the world needs to marry someone funny. What I think they do all need is to marry someone they can laugh with. Our marriage is so much the better for the daily laughter Benjamin brings into it.
9. Ben never lets me wonder if he loves me or misses me or thinks I am beautiful. He will text me, call me, message me on Facebook, leave me notes. It's the last thing he tells me before we fall asleep at night and often the first thing he says when he wakes up.
10. Ben loves the Lord. He makes sure we make it to church every week. He leads me in scripture study and remembers to pray more often than I do. He holds my hand every night as we kneel in couple prayer. Benjamin has a wonderful, strong testimony and that testimony makes our marriage so much the better.
That is my Grandpa Sue's favorite lessons for the grandchildren--that my grandfather knows how to make a marriage work and why.
Benjamin, too, knows how to make a marriage work. This is a list of some of those ways.
1. Ben is patient with me. Even when I am grumpy or talkative or irritated or excited.
2. Ben does all the little things still--things like opening the door or putting his arm around me in church.
3. Ben does the dishes while I'm at work and offers to help with dinner.
4. Ben will do things for me even when it isn't necessarily the thing he wants to be doing. He goes grocery shopping and helps me with math homework late at night and drives me to dance.
5. Ben never treats me poorly. He never says anything to me or about me that would indicate a poor opinion of me. Ben lets me know that he thinks I am wonderful and that I can be wonderful.
6. Ben snuggles with me in the mornings when we wake up. I don't know if every healthy marriage needs this, but it sure helps ours.
7. Ben is thoughtful enough to think of my needs. He will carry heavy things, unload the car, and give up his jacket in the cold for me. I never even have to ask.
8. Ben makes me laugh. It is my personal opinion that not every person in the world needs to marry someone funny. What I think they do all need is to marry someone they can laugh with. Our marriage is so much the better for the daily laughter Benjamin brings into it.
9. Ben never lets me wonder if he loves me or misses me or thinks I am beautiful. He will text me, call me, message me on Facebook, leave me notes. It's the last thing he tells me before we fall asleep at night and often the first thing he says when he wakes up.
10. Ben loves the Lord. He makes sure we make it to church every week. He leads me in scripture study and remembers to pray more often than I do. He holds my hand every night as we kneel in couple prayer. Benjamin has a wonderful, strong testimony and that testimony makes our marriage so much the better.
Sunday, August 25, 2013
Our First Date, The Spark, and Green Eggs and Ham
The short version of the back story:
As you might have read in our last post. When Charly and I went on our first date she didn't think that she would like me.
I had a huge crush on Charly and so I did what any normal person would do when they have a crush on someone. I Facebook stalked her... The only problem was I had no clue how to Facebook stalk anyone. I was just off my mission and really hadn't used Facebook before. I'm sure you will get Charly's end of that story but needless to say, I thought I was being super sneaky.
To ask Charly out I asked Jeremy (her cousin and my best friend) to get her phone number for me. I figured that would be better than asking for it on Facebook. I was living up in Ogden and didn't get a chance to see her very often.
Jeremy and I planned the date together. It was going to be a double date but Jeremy new that I liked Charly and so we were going to do something that we new she would like. We both new that she liked to write and so we wanted to do something with a story to it. We decided on a puppet show.
I'm not sure why but we decided to do Green Eggs and Ham. Yup.
For the puppets in the show we got popsicle sticks and glued pictures on them. When we were looking at buying the popsicle sticks at Wal-Mart they were super expensive.
"We should just buy some popsicles and eat them. It would be cheaper than buying the sticks," I said jokingly.
"That's a good idea," Jeremy said.
So we went and bought some popsicles. We had to eat quite a few popsicles in order to get enough sticks.
The pictures that we put on them were just random images from Google and so the were all really different from each other, but they all went to the story.
The Date:
We picked Charly up and then went to get Jeremy's date. Charly looked super cute when we picked her up and I was already feeling nervous. I'm good at hiding my feelings though and I don't think anyone noticed.
Once everyone was loaded up we went to Jeremy's house for the show. Charly seemed quiet and, sad to say, not very interested in me at first. You can usually tell if a girl likes you if she laughs at your jokes. She wasn't really laughing at my jokes. I wasn't going to give up yet though.
Jeremy and I had set up some chairs and draped a blanket over them for the show. We sat the girls down and then went behind the blanket. I was the voice of the grumpy guy that didn't want to eat green eggs and ham and Jeremy was the voice of the other guy.
"Will you eat it on a train?" Jeremy asked.
"I will not eat it in a train." I replied in the grumpiest voice I could manage.
"Will you eat it in a car?" Jeremy asked.
I looked up to see a picture of an Ferrari, "I would in that car!" I answered. Completely ignoring my script. It worked though, everyone laughed, even Charly.
Sometime during the date Jeremy's little sister Brynndi got home and when she saw me she ran up to me and gave me a hug. I picked her up and hugged her back. I didn't know this at the time, but I found out later that that is when Charly decided I wasn't so bad.
Note to self: I soo owe Brynndi.
The rest of the date was super fun. Charly and I seemed to be getting more comfortable with each other and we were both laughing a lot.
We took pictures and made more puppets by dying socks and then putting buttons and yarn on them. Soon we had to take Jeremy's date home though so we all loaded up in the car again.
This part of the date is the part that I still think is crazy. When we got in the car Charly sat next to me in the back and I felt it for the first time. I felt that spark that everyone always talks about. It's going to sound silly to you because the only thing that was touching was OUR SHOULDERS. No big deal right? Wrong. I felt more electricity in that simple touch then I had ever felt with anyone else. Later Charly and I would talk about that moment and she would surprise me by saying that SHE FELT THE SAME. We were just touching shoulders...
Charly stayed longer after Jeremy's date had left. We watched some show at Jeremy's but all I remember was that I was sitting next to her and I didn't want her to leave.
As you might have read in our last post. When Charly and I went on our first date she didn't think that she would like me.
I had a huge crush on Charly and so I did what any normal person would do when they have a crush on someone. I Facebook stalked her... The only problem was I had no clue how to Facebook stalk anyone. I was just off my mission and really hadn't used Facebook before. I'm sure you will get Charly's end of that story but needless to say, I thought I was being super sneaky.
To ask Charly out I asked Jeremy (her cousin and my best friend) to get her phone number for me. I figured that would be better than asking for it on Facebook. I was living up in Ogden and didn't get a chance to see her very often.
Jeremy and I planned the date together. It was going to be a double date but Jeremy new that I liked Charly and so we were going to do something that we new she would like. We both new that she liked to write and so we wanted to do something with a story to it. We decided on a puppet show.
I'm not sure why but we decided to do Green Eggs and Ham. Yup.
For the puppets in the show we got popsicle sticks and glued pictures on them. When we were looking at buying the popsicle sticks at Wal-Mart they were super expensive.
"We should just buy some popsicles and eat them. It would be cheaper than buying the sticks," I said jokingly.
"That's a good idea," Jeremy said.
So we went and bought some popsicles. We had to eat quite a few popsicles in order to get enough sticks.
The pictures that we put on them were just random images from Google and so the were all really different from each other, but they all went to the story.
The Date:
We picked Charly up and then went to get Jeremy's date. Charly looked super cute when we picked her up and I was already feeling nervous. I'm good at hiding my feelings though and I don't think anyone noticed.
Once everyone was loaded up we went to Jeremy's house for the show. Charly seemed quiet and, sad to say, not very interested in me at first. You can usually tell if a girl likes you if she laughs at your jokes. She wasn't really laughing at my jokes. I wasn't going to give up yet though.
Jeremy and I had set up some chairs and draped a blanket over them for the show. We sat the girls down and then went behind the blanket. I was the voice of the grumpy guy that didn't want to eat green eggs and ham and Jeremy was the voice of the other guy.
"Will you eat it on a train?" Jeremy asked.
"I will not eat it in a train." I replied in the grumpiest voice I could manage.
"Will you eat it in a car?" Jeremy asked.
I looked up to see a picture of an Ferrari, "I would in that car!" I answered. Completely ignoring my script. It worked though, everyone laughed, even Charly.
Sometime during the date Jeremy's little sister Brynndi got home and when she saw me she ran up to me and gave me a hug. I picked her up and hugged her back. I didn't know this at the time, but I found out later that that is when Charly decided I wasn't so bad.
Note to self: I soo owe Brynndi.
The rest of the date was super fun. Charly and I seemed to be getting more comfortable with each other and we were both laughing a lot.
We took pictures and made more puppets by dying socks and then putting buttons and yarn on them. Soon we had to take Jeremy's date home though so we all loaded up in the car again.
This part of the date is the part that I still think is crazy. When we got in the car Charly sat next to me in the back and I felt it for the first time. I felt that spark that everyone always talks about. It's going to sound silly to you because the only thing that was touching was OUR SHOULDERS. No big deal right? Wrong. I felt more electricity in that simple touch then I had ever felt with anyone else. Later Charly and I would talk about that moment and she would surprise me by saying that SHE FELT THE SAME. We were just touching shoulders...
Charly stayed longer after Jeremy's date had left. We watched some show at Jeremy's but all I remember was that I was sitting next to her and I didn't want her to leave.
Our First Date: When I accidentally forgot about Ben being a creepy Facebook stalker and fell in love with him instead.
After the night that Benjamin and I met (http://lovegogglesbc.blogspot.com/2013/08/the-first-spark-between-benjamin-and-me.html), I might have fallen in love with him. I might have, except for the fact that he turned into a creeper.
I'm not kidding.
He looked through all my pictures on Facebook. ALL of them.
All the way back to the ones from seventh grade.
And I knew about it, because he commented on half of them.
He liked everything I posted on Facebook. Everything.
And then he would he would comment on it.
And try to start conversations about his mission and his family in the comments.
Ben was all over my Facebook.
He even friended my mom.
I was just like, Who are you? I don't even know you.
Ben says he was being subtle.
Then came the time that he asked for my number. Ben didn't ask for it on Facebook, despite the fact that we were apparently best friends on there. Nope, he told my cousin (our mutual best friend) Jeremy to get it for him.
Jeremy called me up. He said, and I quote, "Hey, Ben wants to know if he can have your number, but he can't tell you why yet." He can't tell you why yet? What, is this some sort of mystery story? Like I don't already know why he wants my number.
Turns out, his "secret" reason for wanting my number was so he could text me on my birthday.
The week after Christmas break, I was back at work, vacuuming classrooms after school, when Jeremy called me. Our conversation went something like this:
"What're you doing on Friday?" Jeremy asked.
"Mmm ... Maybe babysitting. I don't have anything planned yet. Why?" I said.
"Just wondering." Jeremy said.
I waited, but Jeremy didn't elaborate. "What do you mean, just wondering?"
"Nothing. I was just wondering."
I didn't buy it. People don't just call other people up and ask what they're doing on a certain day simply because their curious. Especially when those people are me and Jeremy.
Before I could question him further, however, Jeremy hung up the phone. I was pretty sure I knew why he'd called. My suspicions were confirmed when, five minutes later, Ben called me.
He asked me to go with him on a date Friday night. I said yes, because I was trying to date a hundred guys and, creeper though he was, he did seem nice. I hung up thinking, We could probably end up pretty good friends.
Ben was late picking me up. When he came to the door, I was struck again with just how cute he was. I didn't let it get to me, however. There are plenty of attractive men in this world, but that doesn't mean you have to fall in love with them all.
For the date, we made sock puppets together. We had yarn and buttons, along with a package of new socks. At first, it was a little bit awkward. I didn't know what to say and Ben was (what I now know to be uncharacteristically) quiet. The awkwardness helped remind me that I did not want anything at all to happen between Ben and I.
Then Brynndi got home from school. Brynndi is Jeremy's little sister. She absolutely adores Benjamin, and Ben adores her right back. Brynndi walked through the door, saw Ben, and ran towards him. Ben held arms out for her and picked her up, swinging her. Both of them were laughing.
I watched and my heart melted to my toes. I had never seen anything more adorable in my life.
Soon after that, Ben and I started laughing together. We found food coloring and started dying our sock puppets. We spilled it all over the counter and couldn't get it to come off. For some reason, that was absolutely hilarious to us. Ben and I were laughing so hard together.
The boys had put together a little puppet show of Green Eggs and Ham for the girls. They performed it for us after we'd finished our sock puppets. It was very cute and they had us laughing our heads off.
We played a game, still laughing together, until Jeremy's date had to go home. We all loaded into the car. Because they had just picked up Brynndi, her car seat was still in the back. I climbed in, sitting in the middle seat. Ben slid in next to me, close enough that our arms touched.
I don't even know how to describe what happened. It felt like ... like when we kiss.
I know, I know, our arms touched. How romantic. Except, that it really was. It was like magic.
It was only ten o'clock and I didn't have a curfew, so I went back to Jeremy's house with the boys. We watched Psych until midnight, when they finally took me home.
I went home feeling on top of the world.
I'm not kidding.
He looked through all my pictures on Facebook. ALL of them.
All the way back to the ones from seventh grade.
And I knew about it, because he commented on half of them.
He liked everything I posted on Facebook. Everything.
And then he would he would comment on it.
And try to start conversations about his mission and his family in the comments.
Ben was all over my Facebook.
He even friended my mom.
I was just like, Who are you? I don't even know you.
Ben says he was being subtle.
Then came the time that he asked for my number. Ben didn't ask for it on Facebook, despite the fact that we were apparently best friends on there. Nope, he told my cousin (our mutual best friend) Jeremy to get it for him.
Jeremy called me up. He said, and I quote, "Hey, Ben wants to know if he can have your number, but he can't tell you why yet." He can't tell you why yet? What, is this some sort of mystery story? Like I don't already know why he wants my number.
Turns out, his "secret" reason for wanting my number was so he could text me on my birthday.
The week after Christmas break, I was back at work, vacuuming classrooms after school, when Jeremy called me. Our conversation went something like this:
"What're you doing on Friday?" Jeremy asked.
"Mmm ... Maybe babysitting. I don't have anything planned yet. Why?" I said.
"Just wondering." Jeremy said.
I waited, but Jeremy didn't elaborate. "What do you mean, just wondering?"
"Nothing. I was just wondering."
I didn't buy it. People don't just call other people up and ask what they're doing on a certain day simply because their curious. Especially when those people are me and Jeremy.
Before I could question him further, however, Jeremy hung up the phone. I was pretty sure I knew why he'd called. My suspicions were confirmed when, five minutes later, Ben called me.
He asked me to go with him on a date Friday night. I said yes, because I was trying to date a hundred guys and, creeper though he was, he did seem nice. I hung up thinking, We could probably end up pretty good friends.
Ben was late picking me up. When he came to the door, I was struck again with just how cute he was. I didn't let it get to me, however. There are plenty of attractive men in this world, but that doesn't mean you have to fall in love with them all.
For the date, we made sock puppets together. We had yarn and buttons, along with a package of new socks. At first, it was a little bit awkward. I didn't know what to say and Ben was (what I now know to be uncharacteristically) quiet. The awkwardness helped remind me that I did not want anything at all to happen between Ben and I.
Then Brynndi got home from school. Brynndi is Jeremy's little sister. She absolutely adores Benjamin, and Ben adores her right back. Brynndi walked through the door, saw Ben, and ran towards him. Ben held arms out for her and picked her up, swinging her. Both of them were laughing.
I watched and my heart melted to my toes. I had never seen anything more adorable in my life.
Soon after that, Ben and I started laughing together. We found food coloring and started dying our sock puppets. We spilled it all over the counter and couldn't get it to come off. For some reason, that was absolutely hilarious to us. Ben and I were laughing so hard together.
The boys had put together a little puppet show of Green Eggs and Ham for the girls. They performed it for us after we'd finished our sock puppets. It was very cute and they had us laughing our heads off.
We played a game, still laughing together, until Jeremy's date had to go home. We all loaded into the car. Because they had just picked up Brynndi, her car seat was still in the back. I climbed in, sitting in the middle seat. Ben slid in next to me, close enough that our arms touched.
I don't even know how to describe what happened. It felt like ... like when we kiss.
I know, I know, our arms touched. How romantic. Except, that it really was. It was like magic.
It was only ten o'clock and I didn't have a curfew, so I went back to Jeremy's house with the boys. We watched Psych until midnight, when they finally took me home.
I went home feeling on top of the world.
Saturday, August 24, 2013
First Date and 10 Followers!
We made it! Thank you all so much for following our blog. We really appreciate it.
Charly and I are super excited about sharing the story of our first date with you tomorrow! Stay tuned. Invite your friends and family to follow us as well.
Wednesday, August 21, 2013
First Date Announcement
This Sunday, we are super excited to share the story of our first date with you. Help us reach at least ten followers before we post it. Right now, we're at four. If you haven't followed us yet, please do and share our blog with your friends! Thanks for the support.
Our first date, when I was madly in love with Charly ...
And she thought I was a creepy Facebook stalker.
Sunday, August 18, 2013
The First Time I Saw Charly
I guess it isn't technically the first time we saw each other because we did meet before my mission but we were both young and we didn't even notice each other, so we don't count it.
Here is the real story of the first time I saw Charly.
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It was Saturday, November 20th, 2010.
It was snowing, I was driving to one of my best friends' birthday party, and I was lost.
I had taken the wrong exit and I was trying to find my way to his house through the neighborhoods. I must have hit hundreds of dead end roads. That's how the neighborhoods are in West Jordan but I didn't know that. I was a country boy from Vernal, Utah, just off my mission and out going to college. The dead ends didn't detour me, though. Well, I had to go around them, but they didn't stop me.
I was late but I finally found Jeremy's house. When I got up to the door there was a note on it that said something about the birthday party being at his grandparent's house. I'd been to their house before but it had been a long time and I didn't remember how to get there. Luckily for me there were directions on the note and they were simple enough to follow.
Before getting in the car I made some footprints in the snow to write a phrase on Jeremy's lawn. It said,
"Ben was here."
I smiled at myself, pleased with the joke.
I quickly found Jeremy's grandparents' house and went inside. Jeremy and I hadn't seen each other since before my mission and it was really good to see him. He had some other friends over and a girl that I knew that he liked.
Jeremy's mom Kim got everyone organized and we started playing party games. The first one we played was a game where all the questions were about Jeremy and we had to see how well we knew him. I'm sad to say that after over two years without seeing him I was terrible at the game.
While playing the next game, Jeremy's little sister Brynndi came over and sat down next to me. She was only five-years-old and she was super cute. She had been practically a baby before my mission and I didn't remember her that well. Now she was leaning against me and grabbing my arm and just being a little girl. How could I resist? We instantly became friends and she even started helping me with the game. Little did I know that the friendship I built with Brynndi that night would play a large role in my first date with Charly.
After the game about Jeremy, we started playing a game where you had to stand up and convince people that some story (one that had actually happened to a different person in the room) had happened to you. The game was mostly about lying and I was pretty good at that one. I'm not sure if that is a good thing or a bad thing. Nevertheless, I was good at it.
During one part when I was standing up, the door to the room opened and a cute blonde girl walked in. She was smiling and Jeremy went over to her to give her a hug and chew her out for being late. I just stared at her for a couple heartbeats. She had a huge smile that lit up her whole face and she was exactly my kind of beautiful. I felt my heart tighten in my chest and I wanted to get to know her better.
She looked over at me and gave me the most curious look that I thought made her even more endearing. That's about the time I looked away and started trying to show off for her. I'm sure I impressed her with my lying skills.
Even though I wasn't looking at her anymore, it was like my mind was always aware of her and where she was in the room. I hadn't ever felt that way about anyone before and I would never feel that way about any other girl.
The rest of the party was fun and I even got to see her again the next day. Every time I was around her, though, it was the same thing: I always knew where she was. She was in my head and I didn't want her to leave.
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Now I know this is kind of a long story but I feel that it is worth it. Next week Charly and I will tell the story of our first date. It is super funny and we will be putting up a post in the middle of this week announcing a little more about it.
Charly and I appreciate everyone who reads and comments on our blog. Thank you guys for the support. We really enjoy sharing our experiences with you. We hope you enjoy them and maybe even learn from them too.
Here is the real story of the first time I saw Charly.
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It was Saturday, November 20th, 2010.
It was snowing, I was driving to one of my best friends' birthday party, and I was lost.
I had taken the wrong exit and I was trying to find my way to his house through the neighborhoods. I must have hit hundreds of dead end roads. That's how the neighborhoods are in West Jordan but I didn't know that. I was a country boy from Vernal, Utah, just off my mission and out going to college. The dead ends didn't detour me, though. Well, I had to go around them, but they didn't stop me.
I was late but I finally found Jeremy's house. When I got up to the door there was a note on it that said something about the birthday party being at his grandparent's house. I'd been to their house before but it had been a long time and I didn't remember how to get there. Luckily for me there were directions on the note and they were simple enough to follow.
Before getting in the car I made some footprints in the snow to write a phrase on Jeremy's lawn. It said,
"Ben was here."
I smiled at myself, pleased with the joke.
I quickly found Jeremy's grandparents' house and went inside. Jeremy and I hadn't seen each other since before my mission and it was really good to see him. He had some other friends over and a girl that I knew that he liked.
Jeremy's mom Kim got everyone organized and we started playing party games. The first one we played was a game where all the questions were about Jeremy and we had to see how well we knew him. I'm sad to say that after over two years without seeing him I was terrible at the game.
While playing the next game, Jeremy's little sister Brynndi came over and sat down next to me. She was only five-years-old and she was super cute. She had been practically a baby before my mission and I didn't remember her that well. Now she was leaning against me and grabbing my arm and just being a little girl. How could I resist? We instantly became friends and she even started helping me with the game. Little did I know that the friendship I built with Brynndi that night would play a large role in my first date with Charly.
After the game about Jeremy, we started playing a game where you had to stand up and convince people that some story (one that had actually happened to a different person in the room) had happened to you. The game was mostly about lying and I was pretty good at that one. I'm not sure if that is a good thing or a bad thing. Nevertheless, I was good at it.
During one part when I was standing up, the door to the room opened and a cute blonde girl walked in. She was smiling and Jeremy went over to her to give her a hug and chew her out for being late. I just stared at her for a couple heartbeats. She had a huge smile that lit up her whole face and she was exactly my kind of beautiful. I felt my heart tighten in my chest and I wanted to get to know her better.
She looked over at me and gave me the most curious look that I thought made her even more endearing. That's about the time I looked away and started trying to show off for her. I'm sure I impressed her with my lying skills.
Even though I wasn't looking at her anymore, it was like my mind was always aware of her and where she was in the room. I hadn't ever felt that way about anyone before and I would never feel that way about any other girl.
The rest of the party was fun and I even got to see her again the next day. Every time I was around her, though, it was the same thing: I always knew where she was. She was in my head and I didn't want her to leave.
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Now I know this is kind of a long story but I feel that it is worth it. Next week Charly and I will tell the story of our first date. It is super funny and we will be putting up a post in the middle of this week announcing a little more about it.
Charly and I appreciate everyone who reads and comments on our blog. Thank you guys for the support. We really enjoy sharing our experiences with you. We hope you enjoy them and maybe even learn from them too.
The First Spark Between Benjamin and Me
Jeremy's birthday is on November 19th. He held his eighteenth birthday party the next day, a Saturday. Aaaaaand, because he's Jeremy, he didn't tell me about his party until after I had already committed to babysit.
But Jeremy's my best friend. In the whole world. I couldn't not go to his 18th birthday party.
So, I told him I would be there late. And I was. I was there very late.
It seemed that the forces were against me that night ...
The couple I was babysitting for stayed out late. They didn't get home until after ten.
When they did finally get home, we had to shovel my car out of the snow. Literally.
I had to get gas. And almost crashed my car into a tree on the way.
I hadn't wrapped Jeremy's present yet. So, I had to stop at home to do that.
And I ended up battling a snow storm in the dark to get actually get to the party. I was terrified.
Before I left my house to drive to the party, I glanced in the bathroom mirror. My hair was in a falling-out, frazzled ponytail after my long, busy day. I had very little (as in, only mascara) make up on. I was wearing jeans and a green t-shirt I'd owned since seventh grade. It was one of my typical babysitting outfits. I thought, before rushing out the door, It's fine, my friends have all seen me worse than this.
I got to the party, but the blizzard had scared away most of Jeremy's guests (meaning his friends, the ones who were also my friends) away. All that remained was his family and three people I had never met before. One was a girl, Jeremy's latest crush. One was Alex Hill, a junior in Jeremy's seminary class. And one was Benjamin Anderson.
How in the world does Jeremy have a friend that attractive and I don't know him? I thought, when I first saw him. I didn't say anything, though; the combination of my shy nature and Ben's good looks was too much for words.
The group was already playing a game when I got there. I quietly sat and watched, content simply that I had made it to the party. The game they were playing required three people to stand in the front of the room at a time. Ben was up when it happened.
I looked up at Ben just as he glanced over at me.
Our eyes caught.
And, I felt it.
The spark. The one that everyone talks about.
I felt it.
And blushed, of course.
And quickly dropped my gaze.
We didn't talk that night, not really. But that night, I went home with a head full of Benjamin, dreaming.
Dreaming of a love story with Benjamin Anderson.
But Jeremy's my best friend. In the whole world. I couldn't not go to his 18th birthday party.
So, I told him I would be there late. And I was. I was there very late.
It seemed that the forces were against me that night ...
The couple I was babysitting for stayed out late. They didn't get home until after ten.
When they did finally get home, we had to shovel my car out of the snow. Literally.
I had to get gas. And almost crashed my car into a tree on the way.
I hadn't wrapped Jeremy's present yet. So, I had to stop at home to do that.
And I ended up battling a snow storm in the dark to get actually get to the party. I was terrified.
Before I left my house to drive to the party, I glanced in the bathroom mirror. My hair was in a falling-out, frazzled ponytail after my long, busy day. I had very little (as in, only mascara) make up on. I was wearing jeans and a green t-shirt I'd owned since seventh grade. It was one of my typical babysitting outfits. I thought, before rushing out the door, It's fine, my friends have all seen me worse than this.
I got to the party, but the blizzard had scared away most of Jeremy's guests (meaning his friends, the ones who were also my friends) away. All that remained was his family and three people I had never met before. One was a girl, Jeremy's latest crush. One was Alex Hill, a junior in Jeremy's seminary class. And one was Benjamin Anderson.
How in the world does Jeremy have a friend that attractive and I don't know him? I thought, when I first saw him. I didn't say anything, though; the combination of my shy nature and Ben's good looks was too much for words.
The group was already playing a game when I got there. I quietly sat and watched, content simply that I had made it to the party. The game they were playing required three people to stand in the front of the room at a time. Ben was up when it happened.
I looked up at Ben just as he glanced over at me.
Our eyes caught.
And, I felt it.
The spark. The one that everyone talks about.
I felt it.
And blushed, of course.
And quickly dropped my gaze.
We didn't talk that night, not really. But that night, I went home with a head full of Benjamin, dreaming.
Dreaming of a love story with Benjamin Anderson.
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